The Isles Before Christmas: A Holiday Hockey Poem

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the arena
Not a creature was smiling, not even hostess Dina
The banners were hung from the rafters with care
In honor of the Cups that used to be there

The players were all wrapped in bandages and ice
While they took turns on IR, maybe once, maybe twice
And Scott in his suit, and Joey in his pads
Talked about rebounds and why they're so bad

When out on the ice there arose such a clatter
They sprang from the room to see what was the matter
Away to the glass they flew, Joe and Scott Flash
Threw open the gate and searched for the crash

The spotlight on the crease of the freshly cut ice
Shone like a Lighthouse (that would be nice)
When, what to their wondering eyes should appear,
But a rehabbing goalie and all of his peers!

With a lightning-quick glove and a dexterous stick
They knew it must be the goalie named Rick
More rapid his passes and clears they came
And he whistled and shouted and called teammates by name!

To Kyle and Brendan and Richard and Andy
To Billy and Mark and Trent and IV Freddy.
And here's an outlet for Sean or Campoli
Remember me?—I'm Rick D. the goalie!

Off the top of the glass and up the middle pucks flew
Would they get through the forecheck? Really, who knew?
The skaters practiced receiving the passes
They tried to skate hard but tripped over crevasses

"Skate! Skate! Skate!" Gordon did shout
"Weight! Weight! Weight!" but Doug was not about
The players cried out, "We need to transition, we're done with the kill!"
Maybe Doug was packing for Columbus or Nashville?

So the players all gathered and tried not to get hurt
For fear they'd end up in a no-contact shirt
Like Nielsen and Silly, and Nate and Gervais
And Radek and Sutton unable to play

And then, who should appear from above the last row?
The owner, the GM, Charles Wang and Garth Snow!
"Gentlemen, look around you, almost to a man...
Get used to these faces, this is the plan!"

"Your goalie's almost back, Tambellini will score
With Bailey and Comeau you couldn't want more!
Even Comrie is healthy (granted we might trade him—
And Silly and Guerin and especially Sim)"

Then they sprang to their sleigh and to the team gave a whistle
And away they both flew like the down of a thistle
But I heard them exclaim, 'ere they drove out of sight
Pray for Tavares and thank heavens for Streit!

--Happy Holidays from Islanders Outsider!