Monday, September 22, 2008

Islanders Film Festival

Coverage of NHL training camps has never been better. Still, with two and half weeks remaining until the season actually starts, you may find yourself with some free time and a hankering for some hockey entertainment. Why not head down to your local NHL Powered by RBK Cineplex and check out the latest from the big screen?

Cinema 1—Speed 3: Overspeed
A sadistic former hockey coach and his henchmen kidnap an NHL team and force the players to drill endlessly with explosives attached to their skates. If they don't keep moving their feet at least 20 MPH, their skates will explode. Starring Sandra Bullock as Annie Porter, the unlucky beat reporter who gets caught up in the dastardly plot—and shackled to the team's captain—and Dwayne Johnson as a former Navy Seal who just happens to be skating with the team that day. PG-13

Cinema 2—Richard XXXIX
A headstrong, young prince ascends to England's throne at the age of 18 and refuses to get off it for 82 straight days. Starring Shia LaBeouf as the newly crowned king and Hilary Duff as Lady Comrie, the young noblewoman who will one day be his queen. PG-13

Cinema 3—Band of Mothers
A group of underappreciated hockey moms goes on strike and an entire youth hockey league grinds to a halt. Hilarity ensues as the hockey moms successfully run for city council and the council's former members are forced to pick up the slack at the local arena. Starring Joan Cusack, Neve Campbell, Amy Poehler, Julianna Margulies, and Jack Black, as the former councilman who finally gets it. PG-13

Cinema 4—Black Rubber
Two overweight, twentysomething slackers fail out of a Sumo wrestling academy and attempt to market themselves to an NHL team as goalies. When they encounter resistance, the dreamers take their scheme a step further by posing as Siamese Sumo twins who can revolutionize the goaltender position. Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill star in the latest tour de farce from Judd Apatow. Special appearances by the Hanson Brothers and Matt Damon and Greg Kinnear. R

Cinema 5—The Mighty Ducks: E-4
When the fabled Disney-sponsored junior hockey team is accidentally wiped out by a massive, errant stick during a clinic with Anaheim Ducks defenseman Chris Pronger, a Long Island-based independent minor league baseball team also bearing the Ducks name is called on to repopulate the roster. What follows is a comedy of errors as the ballplayers whiff on slapshots, watch pucks slide through their legs, and generally fall all over themselves. Starring Charlie Sheen as Charlie Bombay, the brother of deceased Mighty Ducks coach Gordon Bombay, who whips the new Ducks into shape by delivering stirring speeches about old Scandinavian skate sharpeners and bringing in a ringer with a calming presence named Ernie Banks. Co-starring Bud Harrelson as Uncle Frans. PG


Jim McGlynn said...

Outsider- I havn't caught up in a wihle and look what I've been missing. Lady Comrie indeed.

Ken it was great working with you and we will be in touch. I will drop you a line soon- we can grab dinner/ drinks near work. Keep up the great work and thank you for the kind words! Your friend, Jim.

Islanders Outsider said...

Jim, thank YOU for so many kind words over the last year. I'll keep checking in on your blog because I know you won't be able to resist the occasional commentary. And I'm up for dinner/drinks any time! Talk to you soon.